Exchanging Fear for Fear

If you, O LORD, should mark iniquities,
O Lord, who could stand?
But with you there is forgiveness,
that you may be feared.
Psalm 130:3-4

Are you still undone by the thought of your forgiveness? Do you fall on your face in amazement on account of his grace?

You certainly still should!

Think, not too long but just long enough, on your many shortcomings and sins. The times in which you’ve failed others or broken good faith with them. The times in which you’ve even dealt unrighteously, even with God. “If you, O Lord, should mark iniquities… who could stand?”

We could not stand, not for a moment. Frightful realizations fill the minds of those who brave such a meditation.

But the psalmist is quick to say, “but with you there is forgiveness.” When the danger is accurately apprehended, the salvation feels all the sweeter. While we cannot appreciate something which we ignore (indeed, the truth that Jesus dies for sins is a mockery to those who reject sin itself), we appreciate and savor all the more that which we reflect on.

Your sins are very great. And you could never stand before God. And yet with him is forgiveness and pardon.

Curiously, the psalmist suggests that a result of this is fear, but how could the solution to the fear of being cast down in God’s presence be fear again? The solution is that this use of fear speaks of worship and awe.* Consider Deuteronomy 10:12-13,

¹²“And now, Israel, what does the Lord your God require of you, but to fear the Lord your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, ¹³and to keep the commandments and statutes of the Lord, which I am commanding you today for your good?

Mentally walk through the thoughts of this psalm and exchange your fear for fear. Let the great grace that has come upon you in forgiveness move you to a new kind of fear––to walk in God’s ways, love him, serve him, and keep his commands. Indeed, his burden is comparatively light.

* Willem VanGemeren, ed., New International Dictionary of Old Testament Theology & Exegesis (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House, 1997), 529.

Give us life in your ways!

Turn my eyes from looking at worthless things;
and give me life in your ways.
Psalm 119:37 (ESV)

Oh Lord, we yearn for life. The pursuit of you and your ways will give us this life, but something stands in the way: worthless things. Not pure evil, not wretchedness. Nothing utterly sinful––though these things can and do stand in our way.

But most often that which keeps us from experiencing the spiritual life of active union with God is the worthless. The distraction. The tweet, update, or post. The photo, clip, or meme. These things are of little worth. Their utility in the future kingdom is nonexistent. They are temporary. They wither away down the timeline and are eventually forgotten.

These worthless things keep us up at night and keep us distracted throughout the day. Why do we fill our attention with these things? Often so that we can ignore greater problems, responsibilities, or the pain in our lives. So we can escape.

Christian, go to God and run from these worthless things. Their appeal is deception, their substance of nothing. For we can feast and feast and feast again on media and still be famished.

But the Lord satisfies. Even one draught of his love brightens the eyes, encourages the heart, and focuses the mind. You can go forth into your trial with life.

God, turn our eyes from looking at worthless things, and give us life in your ways!

Let me not wander!

With my whole heart I seek you;
let me not wander from your commandments!
Psalm 119:10

Lord, this is our desire. To seek you with our whole hearts. To be undivided. We want no part of our inner lives to be against you. We want the inner-shalom, the wholeness and peace arising from an uncorrupted mind. To be wholly for God. To be seeking him in all places and times, in every work and season. And indeed, to find him too.

We proclaim it, we believe it––and yet we know our capacity to falter is ever around us. So the second line is a prayer. As quickly as intent is declared, reality is feared: “Let me not wander!”

Christian, God will sustain you. Be dependent. Not too proud to ignore that even our boldest proclamations waver without the presence of God which can buttress a shaky foundation. We need his guiding hand, his sustaining Spirit, his life-giving presence.

God and Vinedresser to this limp branch, give me a heart to seek you, and let me not wander!

God’s Remarkable Response to David’s Sin

Psalm 38 finds David in a low place, brought low by his sin. Whereas in other Psalms he lays claim on his innocence and seeks deliverance, here he bemoans of his guilt.

There is no soundness in my flesh because of your indignation;

there is no health in my bones because of my sin. -Psalm 38:3

In this couplet, David suffers a strickenness in direct result of his sin. We find it throughout the Psalm.

For my iniquities have gone over my head; like a heavy burden, they are too heavy for me.

My wounds stink and fester because of my foolishness,

I am utterly bowed down and prostrate; all the day I go about mourning.

But David’s desolate condition is not merely the result of sin: he suffers too from the hand of God.

I know this because verse 3 informs me of it. The lack of health and soundness in David’s body is given two causes. These are God’s indignation and David’s sin, and they are inextricable.

To think that God is so gracious to be ambivalent to our sin is to misunderstand God and to belittle the devastation of sin. It is also to misunderstand grace.

Sin is not a mere quirk or untimely hiccup, it is an offense against God.

Grace is not overlooking sin, but acknowledging it face on and atoning for it. Hearing the vulgar rebukes of his mockers, Jesus, pinned to the stake cried, “Father, forgive them! For they know not what they do.” Jesus embodies perfect grace.

And God would not be God if our sin did not stir within Him an indignation. He is the Holy One.

God cares too much about us to be the ambivalent friend. Indeed, God disciplines those he loves, that they might not suffer continually from their sin. David tangibly describes God’s discipline in verse 2:

For your arrows have sunk into me,

and your hand has come down on me.

The greatest reminder from this Psalm for me is that my sin affects God and rouses from Him a response. Here it is called indignation. Paul later calls it grief (Eph 4:30). It is remarkable that the Infinite, Perfect, and Immense Creator of the Universe could have such an affection for me that my minute comings and goings could sway Him–Him! That truth is indeed too marvelous to behold.

We could never comprehend the complexities of the emotions of God, nor the perfect means by which God mingles his love for his children with his hatred of sin. But as we grow nearer to his heart, the more wisely will we live and the more fully will we love. While my sin is forgiven and atoned for, it still stirs the heart of my Father. May I be sensitive to Him and desire deeply to please Him. God help me!

The Medicinal Psalms

How precious is your steadfast love, O God!
The children of mankind take refuge in the shadow of your wings.
They feast on the abundance of your house,
and you give them drink from the river of your delights.
For with you is the fountain of life;
in your light do we see light. – Psalm 36:7-9

The love of God is so precious, more than we realize. This psalm makes it abundantly clear.

God’s love is like a rare gem among the rubble of life. Compared to all else it ought to be revered and cherished.

How I am so prone to diminish it! It is worth everything!… And yet I often get more excited about a group of men dressed in the color of my fancy delivering an oblong ball across a field. How wretched am I!

It is essential to continually return to a knowledge of the true greatness of the Lord. That is why reading the psalms can be so cleansing to the perspective. They remind us of the sublime glories of God, inviting us inside to“feast” and “drink” at the table of God.

To meditate on God’s goodness and drink of his delights, these are the ends for which we were made.